With Turkey Day and National Kill Someone For A DVD Player Day in our rear-views, it is OFFICIALLY Christmas/Hannukah/Kwanzaa/Saturnalia/Festivus season! This time of year means a lot of things to a lot of people, like love and family and junk, but none of that matters at all whatsoever. What matters is PRESENTS. Beautiful, glorious, run-your-loved-ones-into-crippling-debt PRESENTS.
This year I decided to mosey around Etsy for inspiration, and HOLY HELL what have I been missing?? It's a treasure trove of people liking the sh*t I like WAY TOO MUCH and making fantastic sh*t based on that sh*t. SO. Here is the Christmas 2014 edition of "Sh*t You Should Buy Me."
Slick-Ass Godzilla Poster, $24.36
Nothing says "I refuse to grow up but I'm willing to make compromises" like a stylish, understated print of the King of All Motherf*cking Monsters. And as you may have noticed, I'm quite the fan of Big G.
Ok, so look at how huge Andre looks compared to Hulk.
Now remember that Hulk Hogan is roughly the size of a Clydesdale.
Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant: The T-Shirt, $18.00
Honestly I don't know how I haven't worn through seven of these already. Mark my words, next time I take the stage with the iLL harmonic I will be rocking the proverbial sh*t out of this shirt.
Venom and Spidey Nemesis Shot Glasses, $14.00
I don't really have what I'd consider a nemesis at the moment (I did a lot of nemesis-dispatching in my 20's) but I'd be on my hustle 24/7 to acquire one if for no other reason than I really, really need to do a shot with someone using these glasses, then fight them to the death (or until one of us makes contact and it gets too real).
Game of Thrones. Deck of Cards.
I feel like this doesn't even need Internet snark. And I probably just sold like 20 of these for some dude on Etsy. You're welcome, Etsy dude!
If you have any suggestions you'd like to add, you can go to the (now actually functioning ZOMG) comment section. Happy Get Me Stuff Season!
BRBRCK is a rapper and producer (and blogger, obviously) based in Brooklyn, NY. Check out his musical stylings here.